Wednesday, December 8, 2010

MEATY CHRISTMAS

tDr. Krog: C'mon, family. Who wants to see my incision wound?

the biscuit: I do!

Dr. Krog: (shows 2 week old incision wound from arthroscopic surgery)

the biscuit: IT LOOKS LIKE HAM!

Dr. Krog: Yeah, it kinda does. That's because people are made of meat.

the biscuit: OF MEAT?!?

Dr. Krog: Yep.

the biscuit: No, Daddy. That's turkey. Turkey is made of ham.

me: No, dude. Ham and turkey are both meat.

Dr. Krog: And people is meat. And soylent green.

the biscuit: NO. WAY.

me: And reindeer. Don't forget people eat reindeer.

Dr. Krog: Mommy, we agreed we weren't going to discuss eating Santa's reindeer again.

the biscuit: So people and turkey are made of THE SAME THING??

me: Yes, all animals are made of meat.

Dr. Krog: And I'm a turkey! GOBBLE GOBBLE!! (dances around kitchen on bum leg)

the biscuit: DADDY, YOU ARE NOT A TURKEY! Your leg just looks like ham, is all.

Dr. Krog: And after my next surgery, it'll look EVEN HAMMIER.

the bicuit: Oh, Daddy. You are such ham. I mean a turkey. A FAT TURKEY.

Dr. Krog: I'm not fat. I'm lean.

the biscuit: No. All turkeys are fat.

Dr. Krog: There most certainly are skinny turkeys.

the biscuit: You are wrong.

Dr. Krog: So what do turkeys eat?

the biscuit: Uh, turkey sandwiches.

Dr. Krog: THEY EAT THEMSELVES?

the biscuit: No, they eat chickens. 101 chickens!

Dr. Krog: You are being a big sillybones.

the biscuit: Yes, and I can say OODLE *or* POODLE.

...and that's how family dinner works around here.

2 comments:

charissimo said...

Just to be gross, chickens will eat chicken. Quite readily in fact. And scrambled eggs. How did this species evolve?!

We've had lots of meat discussions around here since the roosters went to heaven - I mean our soup pot.

Anonymous said...

People are meat? That sounds like a bunch of pook.