But I've never shown you topless pictures of him.
You can look, but if you touch, SUCKA MC GOTS TO PAY.
That's right. My science fiction loving, video gaming, Cartoon Network-watching psychologist husband is totally cut. And even though I think he's kind of a crazy person for working out as much as he does and eating turkey cold cuts and mixed nuts for breakfast, I really don't mind living with the results of his toil.
But I admit he's crazy. See?
Briefly, here is his story.
It started with too many club sandwiches and chocolate milkshakes…and um, not enough exercise.
After hip surgery last December, I obviously had to rest up and recover. And I did! [My fabulously gorgeous wife] was a godsend, nursing me back to health with laughs, smiles and an endless supply of whatever I wanted to eat. She is the best.
I may have enjoyed myself a bit too much, though. By last March I was staring in the mirror, looking at my formerly ground fighting-conditioned body and wondering, "Wah happen?" My year-round 2-pack was now a minikeg. I was turning into a skinny fat guy.
Enter Krogshred: 135 Days of diet, exercise, and crazy.
Like Heart of Darkness, but for my abs.
Let me give a shout out to friend and Anthony Wilkins at North Point Personal Training in Roswell, GA. Although I did the Krogshred alone, every exercise I did I learned from Anthony, a really great trainer and a father himself.
Pounds lost: 23 (D says: Seriously? From where?!?!)
Friends alienated: 2
Number of times wife heard the phrase “My abs/pecs/biceps are really starting to show”: 200+
Pounds of protein purchased: 10
Times caught staring into mirror at restaurants when I should have been looking at far more beautiful wife: 7
Dollars spent on supplements and (D says: Don't be tellin' me that, yo. That is not frugal, no sir!)in 135 days: $260
Number on my “pack”: 4-6 depending on the day…
Number of chores done during entire 135 days: Um like 8 or so? Took the trash out like 4 times. Mowed lawn couple of times. I don’t know. Almost nothing. I didn't do jack around the house. Sheesh. Thank god for my wife. She’s a saint.(D says: YES. YOU SO OWE ME.)
Number of times KROG SMASH: not as much as you'd guess.
And it's just the beginning. There's more crazy to come. (D says: NO, PLEASE. 4-PACK IS PLENTY GOOD FOR ME. LET'S JUST GO HAVE SOME FROZEN YOGURT AND CHILL, OKAY, CRAZY PERSON?)
I'm proud of you, Dr. Krog.
p.s. Dr. Krog did not actually do the Shred, like I'm doing. He did crazy, 2-hour long workouts with exercises like Living Death and Crazy Sevens and, I don't know, Total Sonic Deathmonkey Throes of Unimaginable Pain. So don't think that Jillian's videos can do that. You'll be disappointed.