biscuit: Mommy, why are windows?
me: Why are windows what?
me: Are you asking why we have windows?
biscuit: Yeah. You should listen better.
me: Sorry. We have windows to let sunlight into our houses, so that they aren't all dark inside. And so we can see the beautiful trees and sky and see what's going on outside.
biscuit: What's going on outside?
me: Yes, like if people are walking nearby, or if there's a rabbit on the front lawn. Or like when you saw that snake in the back yard last week when you were looking out the window.
biscuit: How does a snake go through a window?
me: Snakes don't go through windows, generally. They try to stay away from people. Especially little king snakes.
biscuit: But what if he broke the window?
me: A snake can't break our window. They aren't strong enough. All the snakes around here are too small.
biscuit: What about a purple worm?
me: A worm definitely can't break a window.
biscuit: No, a purple worm is a big snake thing from my monster book, and he has a big round mouth of teeth and he goes ROWR GROWR GRAAAAAL.
me: Cool. But remember, monsters aren't real. There's no such thing as a purple worm. And why would he even want to go through a window, anyway?
biscuit: To eat our trash.
me: If there is a magical purple snake that wants to come in our house to eat out trash, I will open the window and hand him a bib. That's totally cool.
biscuit: NO, Mommy. He is a MONSTER. And what if he ate the cat? Or Daddy's chicken?
me: Okay, well, I guess we'll keep our windows closed.
biscuit: No, he can crash right through, like BAM. But how do windows stay in?
me: When you build a house, you build a special hole for the windows, then glue and nail them in place. They're part of the house. If you break them, it's very expensive to have them fixed.
biscuit: Then I would tell the magical purple worm, NO, YOU CANNOT BREAK THE WINDOW AND EAT KIKI AND DADDY'S CHICKEN.
me: Maybe we could just buy a sign. They probably have them at Home Depot next to the ones that say BEWARE OF DOG.
biscuit: (sadly) Naw. He can't read.