Tuesday, July 6, 2010

delilah's cupcakery of dreams

me: ZOMG, THERE IS A NEW CUPCAKE STORE!

dr. krog: So?

me: (turning on 2 wheels and barreling across parking lot) Shh. Driving.

dr. krog: You don't want that trash.

me: I DO. I DO WANT THAT TRASH. (thoughtful pause as I imagine a chorus line of dancing cupcakes) WAIT. Cupcakes *aren't* trash. Cupcakes are like my dreams made flesh, visions spun of sugar and butter and hope and love.

dr. krog: Cupcakes make you fat.

me: Yes, "cupcakes", plural. One cupcake right now will just exactly hit the spot.

dr. krog: Let's be good. Let's eat clean. We'll have a healthy dinner!

me: NO. DON'T WANNA. CAN'T MAKE ME. CUPCAKE.

dr. krog: But what about the kids? You know sugar makes the Biscuit crazy, and t.rex doesn't even know what cupcakes are. Do you really want to drag them in there and show them that you're sugar's b*tch?

me: No. I want to go in there alone and snarf my cupcake in a corner.

dr. krog: Look, you're already parked, but you don't have to go in there and waste money and eat unhealthy food. Let's support each other's goals. Let's win against insurmountable odds. We ate a lot of junk this weekend, and now we're turning over a new leaf. Again.

me: NO. CUPCAKE.

dr. krog: (weary sigh because he knows the battle is unwinnable) Fine. Go. Enjoy snarfing your cupcake while your family waits in the car and listens to Gnarls Barkley.

me: Thank you for your blessing.

dr. krog: That wasn't a blessing. And um...

me: Yeah?

dr. krog: If they should have, say, just a smallish cupcake. Like, a low-fat cupcake that looks lonely and needs a home and appears particularly tasty...

me: I feel you, dawg.

*

The verdict on the new Cloud 9 Frozen Yogurt and Cakes
on Hwy. 92 near the Roswell SuperTarget:

Clean, sparse interior that reminds me of a mall. Decent cupcake selection, but expensive at $2.75 each. Cake nice and moist, buttercream frosting not as thick as I prefer and not as good as Cakes by Darcy. The frozen yogurt bar looked really cool, though, and Dr. Krog approved of the peanut butter yogurt with Reese's Cups on top. Other flavors include red velvet, green tea, and cake batter, all with loads of toppings for .39cents an ounce.

Next time I go, I'm getting froyo, yo.

Still, the more cupcake stores that exist, the better my world will get. And one day, when I make a million bajillion dollars, I'll open Delilah's Mad Tea Party and Cupcakery, complete with stylized booths, rollerskating waitresses dressed like Alice in Wonderland, and local artwork and jewelry for sale. And then I'll invent a time-traveling device and work there-- for myself-- during high school, because I'm not so great at sitting still.

p.s. Thanks, Stephanie, for the head's up!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

+1 on the Cakes by Darcy cupcakes. I've tried others in the area but I always come back. Lately I have been getting the 6" cake as it is really just a giant cupcake.

K A B L O O E Y said...

I am eagerly awaiting both your magnificent sounding cupcakery (which is a very fun word to say and write, so thanks for that) as well as the time-travel machine.

Cupcake. Mmm. I need thick frosting and a prefer more goo in the middle. And shades of brown, because that's how I roll. Chocolate, mocha, coffee, peanut butter. No pink or yellow or white for me. They are prettier, I concede.

And not to promote gender stereotypes, but men don't understand.

K A B L O O E Y said...

Typo before "prefer". Thinking about my cupcake instead of my typing fingers.