Saturday, August 22, 2009

biscuitisms

From the past week.

Biscuit: What's that guy's name?
Me: That's the prince. His name is Prince Phillip.
Biscuit: Why? What does he fill up?

*

Me: Please don't make me stand around in the parking lot. COME ON!
Biscuit: I *AM* COME ONNING!

*

Me: Honey, why is your dress pulled down like that?
Biscuit: This is how princesses wear it.
Me: No, honey. Princesses don't show their nipples
Biscuit: Jasmine does!
Me: No, buddy. She covers her chest and shows off her belly button.
Biscuit: Okay. Now I'm a princess!
Me: Getting closer, but princesses don't pull their dresses over their heads to show their underpants.
Biscuit: (sigh) It's hard to be a princess.

*

Me: I told you to go to your room. Hurry up!
Biscuit: I can't hurry up!
Me: Oh? Why's that?
Biscuit: My feet aren't fast enough to hurry!

*

Biscuit: (holds up jar of pain pills) Is this grandma's vitamins?

*

Me: If you pick up your brother and try to throw him again, I am confiscating your princess dress.
Biscuit: That's okay. Daddy will buy me a new one on Sunday.
Me: Oh, really?
Biscuit: Yeah. He loves me.

*

Me: What are you doing up there?
Biscuit: I am not eating toothpaste.
Me: Okay, but what *are* you doing?
Biscuit: I am just checking it.
Me: And how is it?
Biscuit: Oh, it's pretty good.

*

Biscuit: I think we need a giant.
Me: Really? Why?
Biscuit: He will have big ol', big ol' teeth, and he will eat the sharks and other monsters that want to eat my brother.
Me: That's a helpful giant.
Biscuit: Actually, he really is.

10 comments:

Melissa B. said...

Greetings & Salutations...I have a difficult time with the "princess" concept, too!

Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest!

Ash said...

that's so cute! :)
I never DID grasp that pesky concept of not pulling your dress up over your head to show your belly button. sigh. life is hard.

laterg8r said...

she's right, it is hard to be a princess :D priceless!

charissimo said...

Showing your nipples is *so* 1580.

Virginia Valerie said...

is SHE one of the monsters that wants to eat her brothers?

William said...

How hard is it to be a Duchess if you don't live in Holland? Does a Contessa have to go barefoot? Is a female Earl an Earlene? Oh, I give up..I'll never be a Drama Queen.

Alicia Istanbul said...

I love it. She's got your brilliant humor. Ahhh, smart kids...

Jennifer said...

Adorable! I love convos with kids this age. Glad you wrote these down so you can show her when she gets older.

Beth said...

This is why I can't seem to stop having kids... they are so brilliant and hilarious. (And generally cute)

faemom said...

Those were adorable! It's so hard to be a princess. Priceless.