Cashier: Do you want to hold onto this Heath bar, and the Reese's cups, and the Dr. Pepper?
Me: No, thanks. That's not my crap.
Cashier: These aren't yours?
Me: Well, i'm paying for them, but they're for my husband, who is going to be cracked out on Fallout 3 for the next 2 days and will probably forget to eat unless I put those in his lap.
Cashier: Yeah, it's a pretty good game. Hey, is this bag too heavy for you?
Me: No, i'll make my husband bring in the groceries.
Cashier: You think he'll quit playing for that?
Me: If he wants his Heath bar, Reese's, and Dr. Pepper, you bet yer a$$ he will.
I like a jovial teenage cashier. Makes life a lot easier.